I can still see you siting by that corner and I asked myself how many more times will I see you in that same spot, crying, sobbing, and tearing apart. How many more times will I see you in that state? To what extent will you suffer because of him? He is all that matters to you, isn’t he? You loved him deeply with all your heart, until the day it broke and been ripped apart, yet it doesn’t stop for loving him continuously though it had been ragged. You still wonder about the possibility of the two of you, even thousand signs of impossibility of that dream appear. You never listen to others, even to your own voice, because all you follow is the different voices you heard in your head.
You were filled with plans, goals, and ambitions. You dreamed reaching the unreachable. You are loved by your family; you were surrounded by good friends; you got high grades; you have good reputation; until you met your greatest downfall. You met him and he destroyed you and took everything away from you.
You failed in your exams, you broke your reputation, you left your family, and you lost your friends, then you runaway with him. You made love with him felt that every moment is a paradise, every touch is a promise, “I will always love, and never will I leave you.” You thought it’s real, yet he left you too the way you left your family and friends.
You wait for him from morning till night, yet no there are no signs of him. You are hopeful that one day you’ll receive him in your open arms again. You waited for him, but he didn’t come back. Then you’ve been filled with sadness, you no longer believe that you could still be happy. Your voice became a message of sorrow, you build walls, a panopticon, and then you haven’t known how to escape.
“Come back.” your parents, friends, loved ones told you. They can’t wait to hear the sweet harmony of your voice again, to see you write a near-perfect piece again, to hear the music of laughter, and see your sweet sunny smile, to see you fulfil your dreams once again.
“Come back and stay, it’s not too late. “That was the last words they told you.
You know beneath that shattered heart still hoped for their love, yet you cannot go through those terrible times again, your soul is broken, and you don’t have any idea on how to fix yourself. You need an escape; you hear different voices, until the cadence of suffering slowly consumed you, so you took away the last and only thing that you have, you took away your life, to find the peace your heart longed.
I thought you’ve find your peace now, yet I can still see you by that corner crying, sobbing, and tearing apart. You thought that ending your life was an escape, yet it leads you only to more suffering you couldn’t bear.